So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Randomize