i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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