I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
