Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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