that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
