Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
