Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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