Pants 0. Shit 1.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
vagina is talking i cant
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
