all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
