I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
