Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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