Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Two words: blizzard sex
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
