so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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