i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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