i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
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