And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
