Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
