Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
