and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize
