If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
ok first of all what the fuck
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
