is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I want to have your abortion
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
