You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
