Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Randomize
