i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
Randomize