This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize