Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
