just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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