I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Randomize
