moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
