Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
