im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize