If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
