"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
