no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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