I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
i think im in europe. pls send help
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