love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
