There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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