somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
