1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
hell yes lets make some ravioli
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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