ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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