before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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