Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize