He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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