Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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