Plan B is the new Plan A
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I have fence marks all over my body
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
