Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
