I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
