My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
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