He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
