The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
not ubering you a puppy
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
