He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Randomize
